MMORPG Info Logo Top Ten Mindlessly Violent Games

Some days I’m happy and cheerful and at peace with the world. Other days, I’m not. Some days I just want to flail wildly against the universe. Such losses of temper are generally not a good idea in an MMORPG, as there are, well, other players there. Thank goodness that there is a plethora of games offering mindless violence for those of us who are cheered up by seeing cartoon blood splatter across the screen.

I am a bit wimpy about serious blood and guts, so although all of these are gleefully gory, they are all stylised and focused on cartoon characters and stick figures. That said, here are my top ten games for relieving tension through mindless violence.

Caution: Cartoon Violence

stickman-madnessStickman Madness
An old-school first person shooter, this game is slow to load but fast to play. A brief introduction sets the scene and then it’s on: point and click to take part in the shoot-out in a diner, space bar to reload. This has been one of my favorites for years.

nanaca-crashNanaca Crash
Tired of those pesky pedistrians in the cycle lane? Then this is the game for you: simply choose the speed and angle with which to run over a trendy looking young man with your bicycle, to see how far you can send his body flying. Click the mouse when the Aerial ability is highlighted to hit him again. Bizarre but fun.

madmondayMad Monday
This arcade game looks like Frogger turned inside out. You are in control of a car driving down the freeway, on a mission to clear the roads. You can use your weapons or simply ram the other vehicles off the road. Strangely fulfilling.

urbansniperUrban Sniper
Get a target, head on out, shoot to kill. Yours is not to reason why – just do it. The controls are simple: getting the mark is not. Top tip: watch for someone who matches the description rather than just shooting wildly. Check your email for new missions or nasty notes of failure.

sheepcullSheep Cull
There are too many sheep and it’s up to you to sort it out. Grab your rifle and blast them away in this twitch game – just mind you don’t run out of bullets!

clubbyClubby the Seal
The hunted becomes the hunter in this surrealistic game of a baby seal focused on revenge against the Eskibobs. Move around using the arrow keys and press A to attack.

headlesshavocHeadless Havoc
You are the horseman and your quest is to decapitate all the villagers to keep your havoc bar full – the more that escape, the faster the bar dissipates. Extra points for a perfect swing so get chopping!

last-standThe Last Stand
You have a list of things to do: barricase yourself against the zombies, search for weapons, look for survivors. How long can you keep your brains protected?

killcrazyjayKill Crazy Jay
Crazy Jay the ninja is going to die and your job is to decide how. Not so much a game as interactive performance art but if you feel the need for visolence against stick figures, Kill Crazy Jay is exactly what the doctor ordered.

And last but certainly not least:

puppyDon’t Shoot the Puppy
This is the converse of the other games in my list: the point is to avoid violence and save the cute little pet. This game leads you into a sort of zen-like state: you achieve your goal by not twitching. Can you keep still long enough to avoid shooting the puppy?

Posted by Taymar on


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